Rapperswil by the lake (Mixed media)

Day 88.

Being of an artistic bent is an all consuming plight. No clocking in or out. The preoccupation is constant. That doesn’t always equate with stream lined industriousness. In my case I find it a hindrance to productivity. Not knowing where to start or how to adroitly harness the beast being my greatest obstacles to manifesting that which roars to be born.

The work is in grappling with that and what that involves. I am the work and the work is me. I can’t shut myself off to create instead I have to align myself in a way that the work flows out of  me and this is an ongoing and deeply mysterious battle of sorts.

It is a process of  breaking down and reassembling continuously. Allowing all things to exist to become the force of creation being always in flux,a part of everything and nothing at once.

It all takes time. The practice of creating is incorporated into the stream. The rewards come in unexpected ways.

Henry Miller put it thus:

“I didn’t lack thoughts nor words nor the power of expression— I lacked something much more important: the lever which would shut off the juice. The bloody machine wouldn’t stop, that was the difficulty. I was not only in the middle of the current but the current was running through me and I had no control over it whatever.”

The photo is of a breakfast painting of Rapperswil in Switzerland where I spent a memorable afternoon in 2013.

Sitting at the table feeling relaxed and amused in the company of my good friend Monica, the remains of a fine feast before us I was inspired and saw in the debris the church tower, clouds and the hill beneath the blue blue sky.

Playa de la Malagueta. (Pencils)

Day 28.

This is the very spot I’d sit in during my sojourn in Malaga, Spain. Almost every day I would take myself to The Malagueta to sit and watch the sea. After three years of living in London I had a craving to be close to a sea or an ocean and feed the craving I did.

The openness, the expanse of sky and the murmuring motion of the sea quells a deep hunger in me. I find it provides answers to the questions that lie beyond my conscious mind and hears that which what I am struggling to hear myself.

I’ve always lived within walking distance of the sea. I can’t imagine ever not doing so. For me it is the great provider.

This drawing I made to capture my spot, my resting place. Drawing a place helps to fix it in the mind it brings one closer to the experience and fortifies the memory. The act of recording  a place reminds me of my past self and brings me closer to understanding my actions which at the time were somewhat mysterious. In making a record of my experience either in a written or visual means I tie together the links and my see the pattern of myself emerge.

Roof top (Mixed media)

Day 23.

This blog requires editing. I am aware that one hundred is an ambitious goal considering how sporadic I tend to be in making art. The decisions about what to include and what not to are based on many factors. The degree to which I consider a piece complete is sometimes a factor but then again some unfinished works I still feel are worthy of inclusion in that a part of the work is complete or has says enough in its current state.

I am conscious too of showing work that pleases while also reflecting on pieces that have flaws but are still favourable. Overcoming my perfectionism is one of the main reasons for undertaking this project. It is a very difficult to display parts of ourselves that don’t measure up completely and by only showing our best sides we neglect those areas that so need developing and encouragement.

In almost all things it is the mysterious blend of beauty and its opposite that causes a quickening in the soul. I always found that films with a score of 3.5 or 4 out of 5 stars are better than the all star awarded for this very reason. Without a slight element of weakness or excess the essential friction is absent in the whole.

This drawing of rooftop in Malaga is full of flaws. The perspective is very poor and not by

I was filled with doubts about this drawing but something in it the spaciousness and the delicate touches to the tiles pleased me enough so I added a mount and have included it here as a shining example of seeing the mixed merits in my creations.